Have you ever had anyone tell you, “you sound just like your mother/father!” It’s not usually meant as a compliment. As we grow up we pick up a lot of the language and attitudes of those we spend the most time with. Then we have kids of our own and find ourselves saying the same things that we constantly heard growing up.
Some are silly, like at our house my dad used to claim his noisy farts were caused by “barking spiders.” Or how bout good old “pull my finger.”
Some are multi-generational. “Your grandma used to say… ‘If it was a piece of candy you would have found it!’ or ‘If it was a snake it woulda bit ya!’,” are things my mom would say when she easily found something I had been searching for. Or one my dad picked up from my grandpa and often said when my brother and I were being rambunctious… “I’m gonna whomp you with a knotted plow line!” I don’t even know what that is, but I’m certain it’s something they had back on the farm…
“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear,slow to speak, slow to anger;” James 1:19
Sometimes we shock ourselves, like the first time I yelled at my kid, “Go to your room!” Oh man, I hated being sent to my room as a kid and promised myself I’d never do that to my kids… but… when tantrums and tempers flare… dang, I’m just like my mom.
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” Colossians 3:21
I had some tough times growing up. No parents ever do everything right, but I think they do the best they know how. We have to look at our past with a lot of grace, especially because as we raise our own kids we’re going to need that grace from them.
“…be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,” Ephesians 5:18b-20
We pick up on the good things from our parents too. Like hundreds of bedtime stories and a million “I love you”s. Like thousands of family dinners around the table talking about “how was your day?” and “What did you learn at school?” and “How’s the new guy at work?” On Fridays we would spread out a bed sheet on the living room floor for a “picnic dinner” and watch a VHS movie from Video Library. There were beach days and backyard BBQ’s, family vacations and our annual trip to Del Mar Fair for shopping, food and carnival rides. And big family gatherings at 4th of July, Thanksgiving and Christmas, where the adults sat around talking politics while playing cards and the cousins all ran wild… but not too wild.
“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” Romans 12:10
Of course this was my suburban youth, and the things I remember. This was the culture I grew up in. I’ve been watching the new Netflix show “Stranger Things” and the 80’s nostalgia is so thick. Maybe that’s where all this is coming from. We just had our annual family reunion too. Making new memories while reminiscing about the “good ol’ days.” It’s good to look back and remember… especially all the fun times.
“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,” Proverbs 10:11a
When my kids are grown I wonder what they will remember from growing up in our home. What phrases will they say to my eventual grandkids? What traditions and values will they continue? Will they remember the “barking spiders?”
Thanks for tripping down memory lane with me. I’d love to hear a fun memory or funny saying your parents always used. Feel free to share in the comments below.